Hi there! So you want to get to know me a bit more? Here goes!
So who I am to tell you about confidence? Well I can tell you on a scale of 1-10, my confidence was at a 1, three years ago and now it’s at a 7. Even some days it’s at an 8. Having been through this journey I am uniquely equipped to help you with yours
Who am I?
I grew up in a small town called Hyde, close to Manchester in England. After school, I dove headfirst into an emotionally crippling marriage because I was terrified of never being loved. I believe this is a result of being brutally bullied throughout school, even to the point of being told it would be so much better if I killed myself.
It left me with terrible confidence issues and started a mindset challenge that I have been working on for the last 25 years, the first 18 of those years, digging myself deeper into problems. Its only been the last 7 where I have been developing my mindset and confidence to where I am now. Trust me, if I can turn it around, I know you can too!
It went from bad to worse!
That marriage came to an end and I ran to the next relationship. Finding someone I thought truly loved me and wanted to help build my confidence. Unfortunately, he was extremely abusive. Destroying any confidence I had left, leaving me a shell of a person and it took me years of emotional and physical abuse to finally leave. During these years, I can tell you of 4 different occasions where I believe he was truly trying to kill me. I have been choked, my head beat on a concrete floor, knives held to my throat and a pillow held over my face till I passed out. I am not telling you this for sympathy, but rather to share how abusive this relationship was.
During this time, I had moved to the USA with the company I was working for. I quickly became a high performing manager and trainer in retail, but it was like I was one person in the workplace and a different person at home. Miserable, I carried on because I felt like I had no choice! I finally took the step and ran away from this man, divorcing him, because it got to the stage where he was going to kill me if I stayed or if I left. I decided I at least had a chance of survival if I left!
What I didn’t realize was I would have to leave my job because he began to stalk and threaten me at work. I did have restraining orders, but they didn’t stop him. The next job was a $250k sales and training career with a high-pressure sales company.
However, the self-confidence that was destroyed had made me unhappy and feeling fake in the industry. It was also the beginning of a descent into anxiety and agoraphobia, I was afraid that I would run into him or he would find me. I felt like that smile that was permanently plastered on my face was a cheap imitation of myself. Even paying for years of therapy did nothing but have more prescriptions written and told take these and get better.
In 2009, I met James, got married, and started a family. At six months pregnant, WE made the decision for me to walk away from a very lucrative position to focus on what was important…FAMILY.
Over the next four years, I found the joy was missing!
A joy and happiness that with my faith and family I had never experienced before and no matter what I KNEW that this was what was needed in my life. Then life threw a curve ball and James lost his job, I was in the last trimester of a high-risk pregnancy and faced with the horrifying thought that our lives intentions for me to be a stay at home mom and homeschool our children was coming to an end. It was also when I realized that I still had no confidence.
OUR DREAMS WERE CRASHING AROUND US!
We lost our home, had our vehicle repossessed and ended up living with family for months! We were on welfare, worried about how to feed our kids, forget about how to feed ourselves. It was the worst time in our families lives.
I felt like I had to get a job, but fear was making it worse, there had to be another way. However, I was willing to do whatever it took to help my family get through these challenges.
Almost as if it was a divine intervention, a friend posted on social media about an absolutely horrifying experience with her son and daycare. They decided that she would be working from home and I just had to know more! Discovering that even working full time, the results I would see after paying for extras and daycare it was not going to be financially worth a regular ‘9-5’, the decision was made! Seriously it came to less than $30 a week after the extra expenses!
It was an extremely turmoil-filled journey, at one point I had more than TEN network marketing companies going at once! it was tiring and none productive, also it fed into my feeling of being a failure and damaged my confidence even more. This was also because I had the mindset of wanting to please everyone, a side effect of years of emotional abuse. When I made the decision to focus on ONE and myself, that is when everything started to change.
“Its OK to tell people no, you don’t have to please everyone. In fact its not selfish to tell yourself yes! You have a right to be happy and feel joy in your life” ~Karen HewittClick To Tweet
“To truly get to the top of your industry, you have to focus on ONE company. I learned this the hard way, with lack of sleep, stress, torn emotions to companies and very mediocre success. You have to focus on ONE and take it all the way if you want to be a Network Marketing Success.” ~Karen Hewitt
I also learned that not all companies are created equal. You can be burned with companies that were not what they promised. This could be everything from learning about theft from the rep’s commissions, hidden fees, to products that broke easily. Also, one of the hardest lessons I learned was that you have to have passion and conviction for your company. Trying to be a part of something you do not love was as bad as having a job that you hate, no matter what the financial reward.
“If you don’t love it, you are wasting your time. Trust me, I learned that lesson well. It came with stress-induced insomnia and chest pains from the undue pressure and environment. It was because I had no passion for the business I was in. These things hurt me more than I could ever think. Worst of all, it was a self-inflicted abuse because I allowed it.” ~Karen Hewitt
Being so used to success, it was humbling, to say the least, I had multiple companies fail! This success I found in the workplace was because I was not real there, it was a fake me. Then my eyes were opened to Personal Development (You can check my list of recommended books here). This allowed me to begin to grow not only my self-confidence, my self-worth but also to propel me to success I had only ever dreamed about!
“Spend more time learning than trying to play the game, in the words of Eric Worre there are Posers, Amateurs and Professionals. Choose to be a professional because I am telling you right now, the only ones that fail in this industry fall into 2 categories. They quit or they don’t learn! You can make mistakes and suffer setbacks, but you only fail when you let yourself give up!” ~Karen Hewitt
The opportunity that I chose, wasn’t even supposed to be the business I was going to work. Instead, I was going to be a kitnapper! As the companies mission statement because clear to me, that was it, I decided I had found my home! Not only a strong company but a company that had a heart.
The growth and achievements of this company placed them in the top performing companies! Because I can be very number driven, this inspired me to open my heart and eyes to the potential in front of me. Seeing how it was and is changing lives every day became a motivating force that was unparalleled to anything I had experienced before! Soon these changes were happening to me, There were financial changes that amazed me, but there was so much more. The self-confidence, the dreams, and the desire to help others became overwhelming to me!
So what is in the future?
“I am finally loving life and myself. It may sound strange, but even with things helping financially it is not what I give the biggest credit to for my success. Changing my mindset was the biggest thing I could do. It has meant me being able to create a home and a life I could have only dreamed of! Allowed our focus to be on our family while homeschooling and sharing the dream with others. We have crazy dreams on our dream board and we will achieve them all thanks to Network Marketing and my driving force now is helping others find that confidence to live the life of their dreams.” ~Karen Hewitt
“Ask yourself, do you want something different? If the answer is yes, but you are just scared or worried about what could go wrong. Lets work on it together and build that confidence so you are unstoppable” ~Karen Hewitt
This journey is what inspired me to start coaching, I have seen what is possible in this world and can see it from the other side. Quite often coaches don’t see the other side because they haven’t been there. I have! I came out on the other side of a life where I am no longer afraid, with an amazing family, business and so much more. That’s all I want for you!
If I have resonated with you on any level, do not hesitate to reach out and see if one of my programs may work for you.